Speech Bubbles, Pt. II

“So what are some of the advantages of television?”

“It’s usually free. Well, except some channels… like Sky, of course.”

 

“And group two, what’s your business model to help turn around our floundering pet food company?”

“As we all know, Hans, 90% of the Internet is made up of porn…”

 

“Did everyone have a romantic Valentine’s weekend?”

“Why yes, I make love to my pizza and cry on bed all night, thank you.”

 

“Hans, may I ask you a personal question?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“If you were stranded on the Alps with only a goat, what would you do?”

 

“Shut up! Shut up! If we are not quiet Hans will drop freedom on us like he did to Aghanistan!”

 

“I sometimes make the small talk when I am at party and there is a cute girl standing with herself or something.”

“Okay, that’s a great example!”

“But she never wants to make the small talk back.”

“Georg, you poo-ssy, that is why you always fahking lead with the ‘big talk’!”

 

“You cannot tell Professor Pichler that we hanged out at prom! She will mark us all 5s.”

“Then you have nothing to worry about about, Sepp, you idiot-fahk.”

 

“Is everything okay?”

“Well, yeah. I think so, anyway. Why do you ask?”

“You have not yet talked about your nephew this class.”

 

“So what are some of the advantages of the Internet?”

“It’s usually free. Well, except some websites…”

“But PornHub is free, or?”

 

“Hans, what is your favorite kind of beer?”

“American beer, by a landslide.”

“Do not make me a Croatian, Hans. Do not make me a Croatian.

 

“What are some examples of etiquette that’s observed in the United States? Has anyone heard of or seen anything about it before?”

“Americans are very fat, and they love their McDonalds.”

“I’m not sure that’s exactly eti—”

“American police beat blacks.”

“Like, you’re not wrong, but I feel like we’re not quite grasping the meaning of etiquette.”

“Hans, have you seen Donald Trump’s North Korean rally-thing with the little girls?”

 

“So which country, in your opinions, is the best country in the world?”

“America!”

“Really? You think so?”

“No, that was bad American joke.”

 

“Are we your favorite class?”

“I mean, I like you guys. A lot.”

“No, no, that was not our question. Do you love us?”

“Like I said, I like you guys!”

“Poor Hans, he is thirty years old and does yet not know meaning of love.”

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